Hope, and other tragic Human Emotions

Someone dear to me recently mentioned the curse of hoping against hope. It's that faint twinge of fantasy that strikes when the situation is seemingly impossible. At times, it seems that I can hope so much that the thing I've wished for so hard comes true, and all is well. However, that is not always the case.

Sometimes I hope against all hope, and it's in vain. These are the most painful situations, to hope for the impossible, and coming to find that it really is impossible. I've been experiencing this bitter rejection recently, in a friendship of mine. Or, the lack thereof. I'm really not sure what it is actually, but it's not what I hoped it would be. I'm usually so in control of my relationships with other people, and what I'm like, but in this case, I feel......powerless.
I've never felt so inferior as I do around this person, and I hate it. Why should I be afraid? I don't have any answers for myself. When it comes to people and behaviors, I'm usually very good and speaking my mind. This is not the case. Funny how people change us sometimes, even when we think are so stable in who we are. Flimsy, flexible Abby.